I have been collecting "rules" since I can remember. This set is all false... THE LAWS OF LIFE
Law of Mechanical Repair- After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.
Law of the Workshop - Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the Telephone - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.
Law of the Alibi - If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).
Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.
Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
Law of the Theater - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.
Law of Coffee - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Rugs/Carpets - The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.
Law of Location - No matter where you go, there you are.
Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
Brown's Law - If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
Oliver's Law - A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Wilson's Law - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it. (this one is true every time!)
Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.
